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Friday, June 17, 2011

Unlabeled Inside

The other day I went to visit a dear friend who often challenges me in my faith and perspective.  She mentioned that she enjoyed reading my latest newsletter - "12 days of..." but she also mentioned that I shouldn't talk about the money.  I have been struggling with that ever since.  In so many ways I hate talking about support raising, and yet it is necessary for me to be serving God in Uganda. 

Is it a lack of faith if I ask? No, Paul asked certain churches to send him on his ways.  The workshops that I attended said I had to clearly ask so people knew what to give.  I also learned that George Mueller, a man of great faith, didn't ask because he used to be a thief, and so that is why he just prayed for gifts.  Trust me, I'm praying the Lord will provide.

Do I find the money part discouraging? Yes and no.  Yes because North America is so rich how can it be so hard to raise $3425 a month, but no, because a tiny church in the Philippines is selling extra produce at the market to be a partner in missions. 

Do I trust God?  Absolutely... I have seen him provide in so many ways in my life - from a tube of toothpaste, a tank of gas and new tires, an envelope of cash for college from an inner city camp, 4 years already on various mission fields... also friends and family.

Do I challenge God's timing?  Yes and No.  I really feel that God is calling me back to Uganda and I know the Ugandans and Team Beyond want me back.  There is so much to be a part of there - to be God's vessel.  Although, I also know that God has me home for a season here too - to spend quality time with my family and friends, to make a difference at the group home where I have been working for the past 6 years, to truly call on Him as He continually reminds me to "Be still and know!"

Am I grateful? Absolutely!!  The Lord is good and He has placed some amazing partners in my life, either through prayer, phone calls, emails, snail mails, financial gifts, and hugs.  I am so blessed with the wonderful people who surround me in love.  (Thank you!! - you know who you are!!)

Against all missions trainings, I would say that fundraising IS the hardest part about doing missions.  Some delight in asking and I dread it.  I just want to "GO!"  I hate it that the money has become consuming in my thoughts and actions.  Yes, I can see how money is the root of all evil.  I shouldn't even be sharing this post with all of you because I know the Lord will provide in His perfect time, but I just wanted you all to know that I'm finding it tough right now.  I ask for your prayers... that I will continue to praise God through this time of waiting.

Our church just gave us a summer reading assignment, and I think it is going to be a good one.  "The Land Between" by Jeff Manion.... it's about Finding God in Difficult Transitions.  I'm sure God and I will continue to have some great discussions.

1 comment:

  1. I can't speak from some deeply informed theological perspective, but it is important to share with your supporters what your needs are, including financial. a different friend offered a breakdown of what their monthly expenses were and it really helped me understand why and what amount is needed.
    and having had done fundraising myself, people who supported me need to know what i needed - prayerfully and financially.
    that's my opinion...