Childhood Home

Standing on the steps of the old town hall in the hamlet of Whitechurch, I gaze across the street and glimpse my childhood home. It felt rather strange to be looking at the house where I spent the first 23 years of my life. After being gone for 12 years it's almost easier not to see the old home.

This is the view of the front of the house.

This sign is the saddest reminder of days gone by. A running joke, and yet it hurts. This sign post used to host a sign that advertised my father's cabinet keeper business. Over the years I have seen this sign frame hold clothes for a garage sale or just remain bare. And I only have one question... why has the sign post never been removed.

Here is the view I spotted from the steps of the town hall. My bedroom was the second one in from the top left... I wonder if it is still a pastel pink room with green and brown carpet.

And this is papa's shop - a place where we spent many hours using our hands and some fun equipment to build wooden things of beauty. The smell of sawdust still brings happy memories to my mind.

"Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.
Those who are far from you will perish; you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge; I will tell of your deeds."
Psalm 73:23-28
Celebrating 25 years of marriage with neighbours I used to babysit for was a blast. Being invited over to an older set of next door neighbours was quite cozy, but as converstations continued it was hard to hear that so many of the people that are a part of my precious memories have passed on. A few have moved away, but the village will never be what I remember it to be... a small community with only forty houses, and very few kids. My brothers and I spend endless hours together, roaming free around the village... and loving every minute of it.
But the Lord has led us all down different paths, away from the hamlet and in to the suburbs. Thankfully I can delight in the Lord... He will always be my Home away from home. My shelter from the storm. My resting place.

Wash Me

One big toe slips under the shower curtain, braving the temperature testing, and realizes that the water is perfect for the rest of the body to join. Water splashes down from above - washing off the dirt and dead skin. With a little help from a cloth and a bar of soap, the extra grime, stickiness, and stains disappear and wash away down the drain. Like so many other bathers, a song pops in to my head... "Wash me and I shall be whiter than snow!"


It dawned on me that it's not about how hard I work at becoming clean, or striving to be good. Grace is all about God and His precious Son, Jesus. Continually I need to ask for the Holy Spirit to come in, cleanse me, renew me, and guide me so that I can live a life that stays away from the dirt stains and sticky saps.

"Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow." Psalm 51:2,7

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless." Ephesians 5:25-27

Explanation

I wanted to make sure that my newsletters from Africa also got onto the blog... many of you may have read the next few following posts, but the posts will also be new to some... so enjoy.
I am attending a writer's conference at the moment and I am learning so much about sharing God's stories in my life. Hopefully soon I will write more of them down and share them with you. Check out www.writecanada.org to see where I am at this weekend.

Piki-piki ponder

Soroti, Uganda November 2009
“Are you ready?” After a nod of the head, the engine would rev, the tires would spin and prayers would go up. This month I was able to take a few journeys to the village on the back of a piki-piki and it gave me plenty of time to ponder all that I have done in the past 9 months here in Uganda. I had to travel to some surrounding districts to follow up on the mass grave project and to deliver 19 goats to three communities, to encourage former child soldiers, in partnership with Fida International. I made sure I had my introduction speech ready and always a few words to share. Even if it meant five hours on motorcycle during a one day period, I was absolutely willing to go. I’m sure Mom would have prayed hard on those days, if she knew in advance that I was riding a bike, because the driver was speedy and I didn’t always know the way (although I had a pretty good idea). I imagine that long and winding road is a lot like my life this year, trusting God to bring me to the places that He had planned for me and also trusting His leadership, judgment, strength, and wisdom.
Children in school uniforms often coloured the side of the road as we biked by. Some kids would yell with excitement “Mzungu! Mzungu!” and others would slightly kneel and wave out of respect. It made me think of all the kids I have worked with this year. Whether it was tutoring Lydia Shaarda five mornings a week or teaching almost 90 children in Sunday school, there were always precious little ones in my life. Lydia was a joy to teach because she loved to learn. Sometimes 80 or 90 kids would feel like a rough pothole, especially on the days when they are unexplainably disrespectful or rowdy, but for the most part it was always an adventure sharing God’s Word with these children in Pamba.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” Proverbs 3:5-6. I must admit that sometimes I’d questioned why the Lord brought me to Africa, but then I was quickly reminded that He has used me in so many ways. I have been delighted to host visitors in the International Teams Guest House (my home), visit orphans, read to a few people who are blind, help run a Christian resource centre, sit with friends who are either Ugandan, Chinese or Indian, or lead bi-weekly worship around a bonfire.

“The moment I will never forget is when I came over that last hill. Looking ahead, I saw a huge castle that was sparkling in the sunlight. As I gazed in wonder at the sight before me, I saw someone coming – it was the King running towards me with His arms outstretched. Although I had never before seen the King’s face, I knew that it was Him. And thought I could hardly believe it, beside the King ran the Prince! They had not been able to keep the Prince captive and now we were both here in the Sparkling City! I marvel at how the King has worked all things out in the end. Finally, I am home.” (A quote from “Trek” Bible study material from Winkler Bible Camp)

Occasionally during my travels I would see huge fields of sunflowers and I’d thank God for the beauty of my favourite flower. And it would lead me to remember all the other beautiful things in my life. On Monday nights 14 young ladies would gather in my living room to study God’s Word. These princesses of the King of kings have come to mean a lot to me. During the school semesters, these village girls live in a boarding house across from my compound and we have shared many joys and struggles together. And just like a field of wilting sunflowers, I pray that these ladies will not lose their thirst for God, but that they will spread seeds that will once again rise up to give glory to the Lord.
I have just one and a half more months here in East Africa. I leave for Kenya on December 20th and will be spending Christmas with my friend Zima and her family there. I am truly glad that I hopped on the piki-piki, I mean, plane, and spent a year in Kenya and Uganda. I pray that God will be glorified every mile of the journey and that I will continue to ride in His goodness and love.
PRAISES:
o 10 months of safety, good health, and happiness in East Africa.
o 90 children in the Pamba community who have clearly heard God’s message of love and grace.
o A wonderfully supportive team.
o I am thankful for a family who has given me their blessing to be here.
o I’m mostly grateful to God for using me in such a diversity of ministries.
PRAYER REQUESTS:
o The transition back into Canada in January and for the friends I leave behind.
o For God’s Word and heart, truth, justice, and wisdom to spread through all of Uganda.
o Future direction in my life.

The 3:17's - September 13, 2009

This afternoon I watched a very touching film that began with this quote: “If you want to make God laugh... tell Him your plans.” I pondered that for a bit and then realized that I am the one who does the laughing. God sure leads me down exciting paths I never imagined. And once again I am reminded of Zephaniah 3:17, “The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great DELIGHT in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will REJOICE over you with singing.”



This week I had a few occasions to chuckle under my breath as I realized how the Lord was leading.

ü The Lord was definitely in control when he led a huge Israelite crowd out of Egypt, under the stammering leadership of Moses, and He is still in control as He places fun ideas in my head as to how to creatively teach these stories to 75 plus rambunctious kids on a Sunday morning. The last two weeks have been very rewarding, and I am starting to get to know more and more of the children personally.

ü I went with Fida to Lira, a bigger city, that is 2.5 hours NW of here. (And I actually got to drive the Land Cruiser the whole way – WOW – I was pumped.) The plan was to spend just one day in Lira, to encourage a few pastors, visit a cassava crop to see if it was growing and providing income for a whole community, and we dropped by a government school in major need of repair. I spent a lot of time praying internally that day. So what made me chuckle, well, TIA (This is Africa) it turned in to an unexpected overnighter because the agenda was too full for the day and the roads were too muddy to drive home in the dark. I had to get over my initial bitterness of not having a change of clothes, my malaria pills, a tooth brush, and just living on a whim, trusting that God’s will would be done.

ü There are days when I get just a little too culturally frustrated or tired, and it is always at those times when God provides a fun team activity. On Monday I went to fun Labour Day party with many other missionaries in town. Yeah, a barbeque and old fashioned salads. Woo Hoo!

ü Four times in the past two weeks I have had people tell me that I should be a preacher and that they want me to come and speak to their congregations. Now part of me should be expecting this, because I am a “missionary” after all, but I always have a good laugh. I don’t feel like I can be a preacher, but I sure do love being in front of a crowd. Maybe I need to remember that God will give me the words to say if and when I really do need to speak. I may even need to give it a whirl, since it seems to be something God is impressing upon my heart more and more.

ü A Ugandan friend challenged me this week by saying that some of my blog entries (www.karebear-lubbers.blogspot.com) suggest that Uganda is rather primitive. I was surprised to hear him say that, and so I have been trying to think about that. Do you know, some of the things that may come across as primitive are some of the things I love most about living in Africa? Frogs in the pool – cool. Would have been even more fun if I could have caught it? I would love to hear from you... am I painting a sad picture of Uganda, or one that makes you think or chuckle with me?



I want to finish off with another verse I was encouraged with this week. “Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Saviour. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on to the heights.” Habakkuk 3:17-19



FYI, I have temporarily solved my banking dilemma. I continue to thank the Lord for the many people who are supporting me financially and personally. May you also seek the most Heavenly Father and trust in his plans.



Delighting in the Lord’s Delight!

Karebear Lubbers

Tight Shoes - August 26, 2009

Hello friends and loved ones!



I have passed the half way mark of my time of service in Uganda. Wow, so much to do and so little time left. I am still tutoring, teaching Sunday school, encouraging church leaders, partnering with Fida in reaching out to LRA former child soldiers, holding babies, and leading Bible studies.

I have just finished biking home from the bank. It has been my fourth attempt this week to withdraw cash and for some reason my debit card is being rejected. So I am living right now with less than $20 in my pocket and amazingly enough, the Lord provides every day. (I’m not saying there isn’t money, I just can’t get to it at the moment)... but I am starting to ponder more and more about what it means to live without money. I am stepping in to the shoes of my Ugandan friends for a brief period of time and here are some of my thoughts, or things I have witnessed:

1. The Lord has given me many meals to eat – provided by great friends and complete strangers. Whether I am attending a spiritual retreat in Kampala and eating with some of the national church leaders of Uganda, or if I am biking home from town and stop at a small shop that I often frequent and am handed a plate of posho and beans.

2. “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink... Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6:25, 27 I have heard a testimony of my helper that often her children are left in the village while she works and they encourage one another to not grumble against God for not having lunch, because God is good and He will provide for them. Can you imagine a 9 year old comforting a 3 year old, telling them that everything will work out fine?

3. What would I do if:

· I wanted to care for many orphans and the Lord kept bringing them to my gate. I only have a small place but the big house next to me is vacant at the moment. For some strange reason, I have access, but not the ability to pay rent. Would I allow those children to move into the home, unbeknownst to the landlord, because they deserve a place to sleep? Would I pray God miraculously provides money so that house can be rented honestly?

· I desired to go to school but had no way of paying the school fees. Would I beg relatives and friends for some money? Would I pray that a mzungu could sponsor me? Would I sleep with a man to make some cash? Or would I just spend another semester just sitting at home, watching life go past?

· I only had $20 left in my pocket and I saw someone who had a greater need than me. Would I give that money away knowing that I had bills to pay or no food in the pantry? Would I truly trust that God sees what I have done and reward my good deeds? I have a feeling that I would need to turn around and ask a friend for $20 to borrow... just starting a cycle of poverty all over again.



I have seen many Ugandans just live day to day, meal to meal. I am grateful that I have been able to help sponsor a girl for school, or give some neighbours corn meal and vegetables so that their children can eat. I am glad that I don’t even have to challenge my ethics regarding purity, theft, corruption, and money management. I am beyond blessed with a house, a bike, and a pantry.



My team-mates and I have been talking a lot lately about the cycle of poverty here in Africa. Why does it feel like poverty cannot be overcome? There are plenty of resources here. There are some hard working men and women, who give it their best, but just can’t get by. If you have answers I would love to hear them.



But Dad, I would love it if you could hurry home from vacation and help me solve this silly banking dilemma; it wasn’t fixed by midnight on Saturday as originally suggested. Just like the woman in Luke 15, I will throw a party when the lost coin has been returned to me. Cheers.

Serving daily,

Karen Lubbers

Zaccheus - May 13, 2009

Greetings friends!



Rainy season arrived, left for three weeks, then came back even wetter and more beautiful than before. This afternoon I biked home from tutoring, with three year old Avalien riding on the storage rack behind me, and we watched the lightening strike. “Bike faster!”, Avalien would yell as I peddled around puddles that threatened to slow us down. We got home just before the skies opened up and we relaxed on my porch, in awe of God’s strength. Avalien played with my hair, yes, one of my life’s simple pleasures, until a double rainbow appeared. Incredible!! God was wrapping His glorious arms around us!



As the rain continued to pour, two year old Moses also came over to visit, and the three of us laid on one of the bunkbeds that was delivered today. (The guest house is coming together more and more each day. 10 of the beds are made, and hopefully next week I will paint the last bedroom in my house.) I pulled out an extra big book, a foot and a half by two feet, and read to them the story of Zacchaeus. A simple Bible story of how a short man, a sinner, wanted to see Jesus. He climbed a tree and when Jesus saw him, he said “Zacchaeus, you come down, for I am going to your house today!” When Zacchaeus met with Jesus, his life changed, he gave gifts to those he had stolen from, and he had much joy.



I thought about how sometimes I feel like Zacchaeus. A little person in a big world. A person who makes mistakes every day, but delightfully gets a forgiven fresh start every day also. When I finally take the time to get closer to Jesus he opens many doors. My life in Uganda has been an incredible blessing over the past month. (I have been here two months already!)



I have gotten back into the daily routine of teaching missionary kids and I actually love it.



Occasionally I am able to travel out to the villages to meet with Children Affected by Armed Forces and I listen to their stories, counsel them in the simple ways that I can, put smiles on their faces as I try to join them in dancing to the local music, and pray with them as they strive to recover from being victims of war. Please check out my blog for more of these stories. www.karebear-lubbers.blogspot.com



A three day spiritual retreat in Jinja, with my team, was truly refreshing. We stayed right on Lake Victoria, and I could see the mouth of the Nile river. Absolutely stunning. Then the Sliedrechts and I traveled on to Kampala to visit the Indian embassy (so I can attend a wedding in India in June), bought furniture and supplies for the guest house, visited doctors, and bought a few extra fun groceries.

I am now teaching 90 plus children on Sunday mornings, ages 3-12, and I am mentoring four young people on how to do children’s ministry. It is so much fun.



And just like Zacchaeus, I want to give away the gifts that God has given to me. I share friendship, joy, food, laughter, and peace with those around me. I am seeking to be better at hearing God’s voice and trusting in Him completely.



Thank you for climbing a tree with me, and for catching a glimpse at how the Lord is at work here in Soroti, and in my life. May you be eating with Jesus too, before the day is done.



Feeling humbly bigger every moment,

Karen Lubbers