A Missionary's Lament

Dear reader: there have been a few thoughts stirring in my mind lately, especially when I think about trying to plan the future. Moses and I absolutely love living and serving in Gulu, northern Uganda, but when you are working with the Lord, you never know when the journey will take a fork in the road. I realized nine years ago that a change in health can change your course. But so can politics, Ebola and Covid-19, children, and finances. 

At the moment, KLM is not flying to Uganda because of the Ebola outbreak, which is hard for some people. Many of our missionary colleagues have had teams cancel their summer plans because of the transportation and quarantine requirements. But, we are fine-happy and healthy to be where we are and we continue to pray for this nation that is diligently keeping the medical crisis at bay.  

Politically, all residing foreigners must register now for an Identification Number. And there is a possibility that the new "Sovereignty Law" will tax foreign income that gets sent over to Uganda. We pray for God's peace and justice and wisdom in the process. We are not sure as it is most likely that this law will be challenged but we continue to pray for the President as he leads in the Pearl of Africa.

Moses really wants to come to Canada for Christmas and a "home service", either this year or next year, but it almost makes me feel anxious. And here are the few thoughts as to why:

• It will be winter and freezing cold, and I don't adjust well to that. Moses will actually have an easier time than I will. I'm sure I will be snuggling under as many blankets as I can find!
• We absolutely love having my parents place as a home base - a place where we are truly welcomed and there is space enough to spread out our suitcases and collect items along the way to bring back to Uganda. But, there are always many more housing arrangements that need to be lined up while we are there; and for three months, you feel like a couch surfer. Please don't take me to be complainer... we truly love catching up with our people, and being sacrificially hosted in their lovely homes is such a blessing, but it's still a lot to organize and our sleep patterns often go way off.
• And in order to get to those homes, or to visit donors, friends, and family, we always need to find a car to borrow or rent. But again, the Lord has always provided a vehicle for us to move around and we are super grateful!
• No matter when we come, life in North America is expensive. In some ways, it's even harder for us because we still have to care for our home and some ministry expenses in Uganda while we are reconnecting in Canada. Moses and I cry almost every time we eat out because we know how much that would pay for in Uganda, and so our emotions are always tightly wound. And we want to be good stewards of the resources God has granted to us.
• Is it selfish to say that gift cards - to restaurants, fuel, Walmart, grocery stores or Amazon would be helpful and encouraging while we are there? Maybe even a barber or a dentist!
• We also want to go to Costco without feeling guilty for buying a few groceries that could take us a year to consume, while at home in Gulu. The outdoor market in Gulu is fairly reasonable in price - the fresh meats, fruits and vegetables, but anything imported is super costly - cereal, granola bars, nut mixes, etc., so whenever we come to North America, we like to stock up.

For those who might not know, "home service" is a time when we go back to our countries of origin and share reports of what God is doing in Uganda. We meet with donors, raise more funds, get medical check-ups, while at the same time - we are still overseeing the work in Uganda. It's supposed to be home, but I have spent more than half of my life living outside of Canada and it is no longer home. I don't fit in the way I would want to anymore. And my husband is a Ugandan, so it's certainly not home for him either. Children have grown up. People have moved. Pastors have changed. Politics has diversified. My childhood bestie moved Stateside. Elders have passed. Life is just different.

I love it that Resonate Global Mission has given that time of "home-service" (I don't like that phrase because it's not home) or "furlough" (it's not a break) the name of RECONNECT. And I love that name for that season of crossing the ocean to reconnect with family, friends, churches and donors. A time to reconnect with our governments and medical care systems. A time to find new resources. It's definitely a time to meet with people face-to-face, because in this digital age, it's sad to know that when we write an e-newsletter to 358 people, approximately 32% even open the email and maybe 2 or 3 even personally respond to what the Lord is doing here in Gulu and in our lives. While the statistic can be disheartening, real conversations do greatly motivate us... as we can share, pray, and fellowship with others!

Going to Canada is not our vacation time! Going to Canada is not restful for us and it is not where I would choose to go to relax and rejuvenate. For me, a vacation has a different definition, but--Yes, it is a change of pace and culture and we are beyond grateful for the opportunity. And of course, we love, love, love catching up with the many wonderful people who make our lives so beautiful. It's our hearts cry to also introduce our daughters to all those who mean so much to us - and hopefully soon  Lord willing!

I hope you do not see this email as complaining, only as insightful to the thoughts and realities that cross my mind. You, dear reader, mean the world to us!! And we want you to know that you are invited this way - to come and share our lives and be encouraged by God's goodness here in Gulu and beyond. Thank you for caring about my thoughts today! You are a blessing to me/us. We remain anchored in God's inexhaustible love and compassion as well as your prayers, encouragement and support for us and His work here in Uganda. Together, let us keep riding in God's palms.